Mayhem In the Bathhouse
by yarmshmee
Summary: Kakashi only wanted to read the lastest volume of Come Come Paradies in peace, so how the heck did he manage to score front coverage in the newspapers of him naked?


Mayhem in the Bathhouse

Cool and composed even at five o clock in the morning, Kakashi sensei started off the day like any other day: Eating a hearty breakfast so he could do his daily brisk morning jog of 500 laps around the village; visiting the memorial which contained his best friends names; coming back home to take a quick cold shower before putting in another afternoon with Team Seven doing several minor missions where of course, he had to pull Naruto out of a couple tight spots; handing in his daily group progress and mission report to Iruka, whom he had a little chat during lunch before moving on to his next and favorite activity, catching up on the latest volume of "Come Come Paradise".

He stopped by his favorite bookstore, (whose name is withheld so other readers shall not lose any respect for this certain perverted jounin,) and quickly purchased the latest issue and went off on his way with his nose glued to the pages. He walked down the dusty leave covered streets of Konoha and shivered a little when a cold gust ruffled his silvery gray hair. _Winter's coming… what a cold day today, _he thought pausing from the seductive book. _I think this would be a better read if I head on over to the hot springs and warm up. Much more relaxing than out here, and a lot warmer than at home. Plus, I could do in for a nice hot soak. _

Burying his nose back into his book, he wandered over to the hot springs, which was currently slow for business, and quickly got undressed, grabbed a few towels and walked out and into the soothing hot baths. A sigh of relaxation escaped his masked mouth (why he didn't take it off was still a mystery) as he settled in. _Wow, that feels a lot better. Woo! Now what happens next? _He didn't notice the commotion that suddenly started around him he was so immersed into his book.

"AHH! KAKASHI SENSEI?"

Kakashi lazily looked up from his book to see two rather appalled young ladies, one with long blonde hair tied into cute pigtails, the other with even longer silvery hair that was relatively gristly. _What's going on? Wait a minute…_The embarrassing situation quickly came into realization.

"What the hell? Why are the ladies in this hot spring?"

Kakashi saw that he was the only male in the spring and a blush came tingling up through his skin. "Oh…"

The girls started screaming and throwing whatever in arm's reach at him to chase him out.

"I'm sorry! I didn't realize! I didn't see! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" But his apology wasn't enough for the girls and there was only so much he could dodge while trying to escape their wraths. He jumped out of the hot spring and the screams grew even louder.

"AAH!" He had taken off his towel when he entered the bath and didn't realize that until he jumped out of the hot waters rather… exposed. When his hands first flew to cover his chest, Kakashi wondered why the hell he did that and quickly hid behind poor "Come Come Paradise" what _really _needed concealing. "Crap! How the hell did I manage this?"

The two girls that he saw earlier, who were laughing hysterically until now, suddenly created two big puffs of smoke. When the smoke cleared, a rather naked Naruto and Jiraiya were standing gaping at the rather naked Kakashi.

"AAH!"

"WHAT THE HELL!"

"Naruto! Jariya! What the hell are you doing here!"

Like an erupting volcano, all the shrieking girls in the bath threw everything they could with all their might and even the skilled shinobi couldn't dodge everything.

"Ow! That was a rock!" yelled Naruto, who was immediately hit with another rock. "We're very sorry!"

"But thank you for all the peeks!" giggled the Pervert Senin, as Naruto liked to call Jiraiya.

The three men ran off to the proper hot spring and swam to the farthest point from the girls sector. Kakashi, Naruto and Jiraiya all let out sighs of relief.

"We made it! And not a single scratch!" Jiraiya punched the air in victory.

"Speak for yourself Pervert Senin!" Naruto pointed at a large lump emerging from the back of his head. "Maybe _you _got out of there alive, but I'll have these battle scars for life! What if Sakura finds out! What if _Sasuke _finds out! He'll never let me live it down!"

"_I'll _never let you live it down!" said Kakashi, piercing daggers with his eyes aimed right at Naruto. "And _you_! Jiraiya! What kind of example are you setting for this kid?" Jiraiya looked away, blushing in embarrassment.

"It's uh… training! And inspiration! I don't write those books that good without inspiration!" he said, trying to muster up some composure, but Kakashi leveled with that as he pulled out his book, which was still in mint condition (Kakashi must've protected it with his life) and hid his face behind the pages.

"But what were _you _doing, walking right into the ladies' baths just like that, casually and composed like you didn't know what you were doing!" demanded Naruto. "Hell, I'll never let _you _live it down either!"

"Hey," snapped Kakashi behind the book. "At least I didn't sneak in there with your so called "Sexy no Jutsu" and posed as girls for however long to sneak some peaks!" His one exposed eye (not only was his face still covered, his left eye was too) peered over the top of the pages sternly. "And I _didn't _know what I was doing. I was too.. uh… engrossed with this book…" One could see his blushing peek through what was still left to see on his face.

"I'm not sure what's worse anymore!" cried Naruto, swimming out in front of the two men, pointing at Kakashi first, "You reading naughty books and wandering into the girls baths like you didn't know what's going on-" (Kakashi tried to protest but Jiraiya's laughing over rid him.) "Or you!" He landed another finger at Jiraiya. "Tricking me into teaching you how to do my 'Sexy no Jutsu' in a the girls' hot spring claiming that it was the men's and no one was going to use it today!"

Kakashi groaned. _What a bunch of morons. Didn't Naruto read the sign outside? Then again, I didn't… but I was reading this book! Oh what a mess we're all in…_

"Well, what kind of idiot would fall for something as stupid as that?" demanded Jiraiya, glowering over Naruto, trying to intimidate him which didn't work.

Kakashi tried to lose himself in the book, hoping to ignore the morons that surrounded him when he received a tap on the shoulder from what appeared to be the manager of the hot springs. "Yes?"

"I'm afraid I'm going to have to kick you three men out. After the commotion you caused in the girls bathing area, I should really ban you from coming here ever again. But considering it's you three-" ("What's that supposed to mean?" demanded Naruto.) "-I can let this time slip. Put please, gather your things and leave the premises immediately."

_I can't believe we got kicked out. How embarrassing. If word gets out, I will never get a moments peace. All I wanted to do was to have a relaxing soak and read this book! _Kakashi sighed in frustration and shook his head when he saw Naruto laughing his head off. "What's so funny?"

"What isn't funny?" laughed Naruto. "Considering we were all in it together-"

"Not really-" protested Kakashi, but Naruto went on over him.

"No one's ever going to find out right? Cuz if one rats the other out, they've got the same dish on them! So yeah…" Naruto ran in front of Kakashi. "Pleeeease don't let Sasuke know! Or Sakura! I'll be dead meat!" He begged on his knees.

"Yeah, yeah. Just go home and get ready for tomorrow's mission." Kakashi shooed the blond boy off. He looked over to his right expecting to see Jiraiya there but caught a glimpse of him in the distance chasing off a rather sexy woman. Kakashi sighed. _What a day…and it all kept me from reading this good part! _He walked the rest of the way home with his senses aware of where he was going this time. He could finish the book at home.

Cool and composed even at five o clock in the morning, Kakashi sensei started off the next day like any other day: Eating a hearty breakfast so he could do his daily brisk morning jog of 500 laps around the village; visiting the memorial which contained his best friends names; coming back home to take a quick cold shower before putting in another afternoon with Team Seven , whom he met up with at their usual meeting place two hours late. He stopped dead in his tracks before he could come up with any excuse to cover up his tardiness. Sakura was holding something rather suspicious that had Naruto banging his head on the nearest wall. Sasuke, trying to keep composed but failing, was suppressing as much laughter as Sakura let out.

"What's… uh… what's going on team?" he asked hesitantly. He was afraid that he knew the answer before Sakura could show him. Her hand shook with the rest of her body from laughter as she handed him a piece of paper? Not quiet, a _newspaper_?

"Oh my God…"

In his hands was Konoha's daily paper whose cover page was a photo of himself exposed as a fresh newborn baby with not but a small naughty book hiding the necessities, flustered and embarrassed running with two other naked males (yes, Naruto was captured in the photo as well, hence why he's banging his head against the wall) running away from a mad crowd of screaming girls.

Before Kakashi had a chance to destroy it (which was futile in any effect; everyone would have gotten and seen the paper by that time anyway) or run away with his life (leaving Naruto behind; he could save his own hide) the same round of angry screaming scarred for life girls from the bath house ambushed him and nearly beat him to death. Trapped under the massive doggy pile of not only angry girls but also other shinobi of the village wanting in on the dog pile, Kakashi felt that as powerless as he was, at least he could gain some comfort from the little book that technically caused all the mayhem and pulled it out to read the next captivating part.


End file.
